Sunday, January 20, 2008

How to be a Successful Husband

How to be a Successful Husband
by Muhammad Alshareef

1. Dress up for your wife, look clean and smell good.
When was the last time us men went shopping for
designer pajamas? Just like the husband wants his wife
to look nice for him, she also wants her husband to
dress up for her too. Remember that Rasulullah (saw)
would always start with Miswak when returning home and
always loved the sweetest smells.

2. Use the cutest names for your wife.
Rasulullah (saw) had nicknames for his wives, ones
that they loved. Call your wife by the most beloved
names to her, and avoid using names that hurt her

3. Don't treat her like a fly.
We never think about a fly in our daily lives until it
'bugs' us. Similarly, a wife will do well all day -
which brings no attention from the husband - until she
does something to 'bug' him. Don't treat her like
this; recognize all the good that she does and focus
on that.

4. If you see wrong from your wife, try being silent
and do not comment!
This is one of the ways Rasulullah (saw) used when he
would see something inappropriate from his wives (ra).
It's a technique that few Muslim men have mastered.

5. Smile at your wife whenever you see her and embrace
her often.
Smiling is Sadaqah and your wife is not exempt from
the Muslim Ummah. Imagine life with her constantly
seeing you smiling. Remember also those Ahadith when
Rasulullah (saw) would kiss his wife before leaving
for Salah, even if he was fasting.

6. Thank her for all that she does for you.
Then thank her again! Take, for example, a dinner at
your house. She makes the food, cleans the home, and a
dozen other tasks to prepare. And sometimes the only
acknowledgement she receives is that there needed to
be more salt in the soup. Don't let that be; thank

7. Ask her to write down the last ten things you did
for her that made her happy.
Then go and do them again. It may be hard to recognize
what gives your wife pleasure. You don't have to play
a guessing game, ask her and work on repeating those
times in your life.

8. Don't belittle her desires. Comfort her.
Sometimes the men may look down upon the requests of
their wives. Rasulullah (saw) set the example for us
in an incident when Safiyyah (ra) was crying because,
as she said, he had put her on a slow camel. He wiped
her tears, comforted her, and brought her the camel.

9. Be humorous and Play games with your wife.
Look at how Rasulullah (saw) would race his wife
A'ishah (ra) in the desert. When was the last time we
did something like that?

10. Always remember the words of Allah's Messenger
(saw), "The best of you are those who treat their
families the best. And I am the best amongst you to my
family." Try to be the best!
In conclusion: Never forget to make Dua to Allah
Ta'ala to make your marriage successful.

And Allah ta'ala knows best.
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